Sharing is Daring

At this point in my life sharing my work is by far the most difficult part of being an artist. If I can build an enthusiastic audience, it will lead to more opportunities to create new projects with larger budgets. I would be able to pursue personal endeavors full time while helping others, especially new artist. There are so many possibilities, that presenting my work is an emotional rollercoaster. 

Sharing my art these days feels like pulling the lever on a slot machine. Sometimes, I’m met with warm reviews and encouragement while on other occasions, I’m ignored as if I didn’t exist.

Passive aggressive rejection doesn’t invoke positive emotions but I prefer that to the in your face detractors. Throughout my life, I’ve been told that I’m not good enough, a mentor told me I would never be anything, and even last year a family member suggested I should quit, but I could never quit. Not even if I tried. 

There have been many times in my life when I’ve tried to abandon the creative pursuits only to be bombarded with a crippling depression.

In my attempts to sound confident I know some might believe me to be self absorbed or overly assure of himself but the reality is I know I’m not the best and I can’t stop. It’s a damned if you do, damned if you don’t situation. As the rappers would say, I didn’t chose the game, the game chose me. 

If ever there was a day when my personal work could pay the bills I would probably happily cry myself to sleep every night. I’ve worked as an artist before but it was always for others and putting their interest over mine.

I never thought I would become a dad so whenever I look at my son, I’m reminded that anything is possible. You miss all the shots you don’t take. 

For anyone struggling with self doubts I hope you can look at me and feel motivated to keep going. I create because it makes me happy and as long as it’s fun I don’t see a reason to stop.

I hope you do what makes you happy so long as you don’t hurt anyone in the process and so long as you don’t forget to have fun. 

Thanks for reading,

SHED